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November 27, 2011

Widow's Weeds

That's an unfashionable word these days - widow - isn't it, remarks Lady Mondegreen.
Yes, it is felt that it shows dependence by woman on man, which would have been a social truth for much of this word's history.


But its origins reaching back to Latin and Sanskrit imbue the elements of the word with universal feeling of loneliness and loss.


For almost exactly a year, I have felt widowhood.
And then with the passing of that year,

Aluminium plant and oxalis

And possibly due to creating Elwin's memorial letter,
I feel that the veil has lifted and my brain understands what it is to function properly again.

Hawthorn and broom

This doesn't mean I forget the place Elwin had in my life, but it does mean that I can begin to find Me again.


Because I cannot make the future happen while I cannot learn new things: how to operate my camera, how to maintain garden machines, or direct building work effectively.


I am also learning my limitations, and that I still miss a man about the house, especially when I am sitting writing my blog late at night, and the toilet cistern blows a valve, hissing mischief all over the laundry. 

Don't forget to mop the floor before you go to bed, calls Lady Mondegreen from her room.

Hemlock  Conium maculatum
Buttercups, meadow buttercups  Ranunculus acris
Aluminium plant, yellow archangel  Lamium galeobdolon 'Variegatum'
Oxalis, pink oxalis  Oxalis articulata
Hawthorn, may, quickthorn  Crataegus monogyna
Broom  Cytisus scoparius
Foxglove  Digitalis purpurea
Mallow, common mallow  Malva sylvestris


Dyk Jewell said...

Good luck with the future Jeneane, it will happen whether you want it to or not. Hope the big trip goes well, you are off soon I believe. And that Lady Mondegreen sounds like a bossy old thing, I hope you are leaving her behind to look after the house.


Owen said...

The growing of flowers in gardens is a good thing I think... for they bring peace of mind with every blooming. The universe is unfolding as it should...

Jeneane said...

Dyk and Owen; thank you both for those reassuring words. I love the flowers - weeds or not - and yes Dyk, Lady Mondegreen reminds me what is important in this garden.
The cistern is fixed, just. Yay :-)
but since the big supply tank is empty Kitty is joyfully carrying water from the Skudder House in our Buckby (canal boat) cans.

the cuby poet said...

Dear Jeneane,the future will unfold however it wants and and I hope that your new found piece of mind will travel gently with it. Take care as the time passes :)

Jeneane said...

It will indeed Claire, and there is a part of me that understands that the unfolding might take me away from this Secret Garden. I am open.

The Sagittarian said...

Loved this post (and those weeds look beautiful don't they!)and I guess you will just be putting one foot in front of the other - as Georg Sand (Amandine Dupin)said "The old woman I shall become will be quite different from the woman I am now. Another I is beginning".
Journey on, journey well. xx

Jeneane said...

Thanks so much Saj. And the quote is wonderful: a bit scary but oh how exciting as well. Now I shall just pop over and check out your Tuesday Tipple :-)

Sisters of the Blog said...

You sound ready to embark on a new chapter. I hope you are able to embrace it joyfully.


Jeneane said...

I am indeed Megan, thankyou :-)

John Gray said...

you are economical in your words
but you write beautifully

About Last Weekend said...

Hi nice to meet you, Jody here, came through Steve, (I'm a Kiwi living in Oakland) Actually Hemlock is pretty cool has garnered such a bad name through the years... Good luck for the future, sounds like you've been through a lot and so sorry about the leakage...

Jeneane said...

John Gray: You are lovely John, thank you:-)

About Last Weekend: Hello Jody. Welcome to The Secret Garden. Yes I recognise you as a fellow follower of Bloggertropolis and maybe Kellogsville? Thanks for dropping in. Yes hemlock is stunning in flower, and although it is no longer classed as a noxious weed (as it was in my childhood years) it hasn't lost it's reputation based on its toxicity. I like to let it flower high up amongst the fruit trees so that the parasitic wasps that feed on the nectar, will keep codlin moth and other pests at bay.